Fast Sunday

It was Fast & Testimony meeting at Church today, where the members can share their feelings and their love of the Gospel if they feel inspired to do so. I of course have not yet felt the need to share (yet). I know that one day I will feel inspired to just not yet. Anyway one of the Brothers, well most of his family actually, gave his testimony. As he was speaking I got goose bumps ALL over! It was amazing.

I also took my quilt that I made for Diva to show a couple of the sisters, especially since I don't get to see some of them on Tuesday nights when I go and I wanted to specifically show Sister Gwen, who I now pick up on Tuesdays. I have to admit that ALL of the sisters I showed it to were impressed with it. They seemed a little surprised that I am sending it over to Diva. They all hoped that I would make something just as good for myself. I know I will when I make the Noah's Ark quilt.

I Surprised Myself Today

Today was fast Sunday at church. I didn't think much about bearing my testimony today mainly because I usually don't think that I have a strong testimony. However tonight I was thinking that maybe I really do... I was thinking about how much I have learnt this past year. I have learnt so much about the history of the church because I have been reading The Work & The Glory that Traci sent over. I feel like I know Joseph Smith personally from reading about him and the restoration of the Church.

I have learnt so much about the Gospel from attending Sunday school classes. I have learnt even more from reading the Book of Mormon. In fact the family has just started reading Ether tonight. We only have around 22 chapters left until we have finished reading it altogether. I am so grateful to the Bishop for challenging us to read the BOM. It's taken us about 6 and a half months to get this far but it has been worth every minute of our time.

I love the fact that everyone in our ward is so loving and welcoming. They accepted us into the fold without hesitation and with such warmth that I felt like I belonged there. It was almost like coming home. I truly believe that if it wasn't for that fact we may not have continued going back every week.

So even though I thought that I didn't have a testimony I really do. It may not be as strong as other peoples but it's there none the less and it is growing all the time whether I realise it or not. Who knows, maybe in the near future I may even get up and bear my testimony for all to hear.

Our Meeting With The Bishop

He was running a little late but that isn't anything new because he is a very busy man.

It started off with a prayer which of course would be the usual thing huh.

You can tell he's done this sort of thing before because he went straight into getting us to talk about ourselves. How we became members. What ward we were in. How long we stayed before becoming inactive. How we met, etc. We had a few good laughs. He is such a nice Bishop. You can really trust him.

Then we went into the nitty gritty kind of stuff .. The stuff you kind of dread *sigh*

He really went into Bishop mode ...and spoke about the Word of Wisdom and the chastity stuff. I'm not allowed to have any pizza!! Well I can but that would be naughty. This is one thing I'm going to struggle with.

He also asked us how strong our testimony is. I was honest, at least I think I was. I said that I have one but I don't think it is very strong. And I explained about the invitations I have received to other churches over the years and how I have turned the invites down because if I was going to church it was my church or it was NO church!

He also asked about our living arrangements etc and what were our future plans. Mark's plans .. Was to go to temple and to be married there. Bishop said he was behind us 110% where that was concerned because he wants us to be happy. So he asked what Mark needs to do to be divorced. I was best able to explain that one because I've been there done that. It really is too easy to divorce, especially after you've been separated for at least a year. However things may have changed a little with the new laws that the federal government have brought in.

Where was I? .. Oh yes my plan as I said to the Bishop was to get Mark divorced and keep him for myself. I explained that I had waited for so long to snag him I wasn't letting go!
He suggested that we get stuck into getting him divorced and then to have a temporal marriage before we even think about going to temple.

Then it came to the temple ... He went through the questions that you are asked to see. I told him I wasn't ready. Mark said the same thing. The Bishop agreed which of course I knew he would.

He gave us a few suggestions that would help us become temple ready.

We even went through our budget and he saw how tight it is for us. He said make sure your rent is paid and that you pay tithing and the rest if you run short of money we will be here to help you.

And we went through our budget with a fine tooth comb. He also wants us to make it more inclusive with things like medical (prescription expenses etc), car maintenance and I can't remember the rest. Mark knows what we need to add. Then Bishop would like a copy of the revised budget. That way he can help better.

We did discuss the fact that we don't want to have a continuous supply of help from the Church. That we would like help to set ourselves up as becoming more self-sufficient by growing our own vegetables etc. He said he will help with that also.

Oh and not to forget .. We spoke about the boys. The big fella mostly. He wanted to understand his medical conditions better. So we explained about the Aspergers, the ADHD and the epilepsy. To be honest I can't remember everything he said about the boys just that he has asked the others to be more tolerant of them because they are new to the ward.

Oh and he also suggested that we come and visit him again separately if we want to so that we can talk about the things that we need to confess basically. So that we have total repentance especially in preparation for going to temple. The Bishop also mentioned that there are classes we can go to before we get to temple so that we are better prepared etc.

I felt a bit bad when he asked me to do the closing prayer and I just couldn't. I'm not very good at them and I certainly don't like saying them out loud not even at home. I know that it is something that I have to work on. Especially since the boys are more willing to say prayers than I am .. the put me to shame.

This morning I was thinking about that blog entry I did when I felt so awful about being in Church and being such a hypocrite. I believe that my heart was just so full of sorrow that I was just begging to be asked for forgiveness. I think it was the beginning of being truly repentant. Now I just need the courage to talk with the Bishop about it.
I never realised just how much I wanted to go to temple. Even though I know I am no where near ready right now I believe that I can make it.